- Talk to your ex
Be honest, if you’re talking to your ex after a breakup, you either want them back or you’re just being nosy about their love life. It’s really hard to stay friends with someone you had a serious relationship with after you break up, especially if the relationship ended on bad terms (like cheating).
- Compare yourself to their new love interest
Regardless of whether you think you’re better looking or more talented than the new love interest, it’ll still make you feel like shit to compare yourself to them. Because, if they’re uglier than you, does that mean they might be a better person than you? And if they’re prettier than you it feels like maybe you just weren’t good enough. The truth is, your ex has just moved on, and you should too. It’s understandable to be upset right after a breakup, but comparing yourself to whoever your ex is with isn’t going to make you feel any better. This brings me to my next point:
- Think you aren’t good enough
Just because your previous relationship didn’t work out, doesn’t mean you aren’t “good enough”. People change, and you just grew apart. Or maybe your ex did something sleazy and fucked it up big time. Either way, this DOES NOT mean you’re not good enough. If they couldn’t see how amazing you are, it’s actually a blessing that you broke up. You want someone who loves you for you, and wants the real you.
- Jump into a new relationship before you’re ready
Getting into a new relationship before your heart has healed from the last one can be disastrous. You’ll probably be constantly comparing them to your ex, wondering if your relationship will end like your last did, so on and so forth. Take time to heal from your last break up and start loving yourself before trying to give your love to a new person. You are more important than anybody you think is cute. Take care of yourself first.
- Keep following them on social media
It’s strangely painful to see your ex pop up on your news feed, especially if your relationship had a messy ending. The best thing you can do for yourself is to unfollow them on all of your social media accounts. I’m not saying delete them, unless that’s what you want to do. You just don’t need, or want to be constantly reminded of their existence.
Over all the best piece of advice I can offer is to forget about your ex, forget about dating anyone for awhile, and just get to know yourself better. For me, it had been a long time since I’d been single when my last serious relationship ended. I didn’t really know how to function anymore. Every day I had to learn to love who I am and become more confident in myself. It’s hard. It’s a long process. But it will be worth it.